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January 2, 2012 by Julie Moon
January 2012…it’s go time! It’s the new year and that means the ball has dropped and it’s officially rolling. This week I get the kids back in school and I head out to Tennessee to do a little organizing work. Getting a client all settled into her new home in Nashville. I’m looking forward to some immersion in my work and also testing out the waters of me being gone and others taking care of my three little moons while I’m away. That is definitely the part of this journey that has me the most nervous. Next week is a big week. Monday and probably Wednesday too I have all my preop to get done. I have orders for bloodwork, metabolic profile, urinalysis, chest xray and EKG. I then have an MRI on Friday in Atlanta. I need all the prayers one can muster for all of these tests to come back perfect. I’m a little stressed about all the finances of this beginning. *deep cleansing breath* I think while I’m in Nashville I’m going to ask my friend if we can do a little yoga in the morning each day…hoping that I can add that to my daily routine this year and that it can center me the way it did when I was preparing for childbirth.
I don’t FEEL scared but every time I write about this stuff I start crying. I can’t pinpoint exactly what it is that I’m feeling. I feel a little detached from everything right now….my friendships, my relationship with God, the Mister. It’s funny the person I feel the most connected to right now is the big girl. She’s growing up so much right now and I think I’m really just enjoying her company so much…it’s uncomplicated and just so easy with her these days. I am going to REALLY miss her while I’m gone.
One month…
Category The Journey | Tags: big girl,breast cancer,charleston,expenses,family,fear,friends,God,insurance,mister | No Comments
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December 22, 2011 by Julie Moon
I had a friend stop me at baby girl’s school last week to tell me about her sister who was just diagnosed with breast cancer. She’s got four children, no family history and she’s young…maybe 40. She was nursing her 8 month old and found a lump.
I had another friend stop me at church to tell me that she finally went and had her first mammogram. She’d been putting it off and decided to go and do it after hearing my story.
These are the reminders that help me when I’m up late at night feeling nauseous that in only 42 days I will be changing my life in an intense way. Christmas has been so busy it’s almost hard to even think about it yet. Today I had to call and schedule a couple of things that must be done before surgery and it hit me hard. I know this is right but man is it just MIND BLOWING all at the same time.
Category The Journey | Tags: breast cancer,decisions,fear,friends | No Comments
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December 10, 2011 by Julie Moon
We had all the bills come in today for Scarlett’s broken foot in October…xrays are not cheap. That on top of the cost of my biopsy, mammogram, ultrasound. We still have so many medical bills from this year, dental bills, etc…and the funniest part is that we were really all well all year. So today as we were discussing the cost of my surgery it came up that maybe we should postpone the surgery another year. I really have no idea how we are going to work another $5000+ into our budget for 2012. So very grateful that we have health insurance and that this is even an option so that I am not facing a $200,000+ cost…but wow…still a lot to swallow. I’m feeling really overwhelmed by the cost.
Category The Journey | Tags: bills,biopsy,decisions,expenses,fear,finances,insurance,waiting | No Comments
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December 3, 2011 by Julie Moon
Category The Journey | Tags: breast cancer,charleston,decisions,God | No Comments
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November 29, 2011 by Julie Moon
The Mister and I traveled to Charleston, SC this weekend to meet with the plastic and breast surgeons. We left on Saturday and were able to have two days to ourselves…without children to reconnect and just enjoy each other before the appointment day. I am so grateful for my sister watching the kids Saturday and Sunday…a wonderful babysitter helping out on Sunday night and Monday morning and one of my best friends coming over Monday after school to keep the kiddos, clean up the house and get everyone to bed before we got home. What a network of great people I have supporting me on this journey. It was reassuring to see that I could be gone for 3 days and things still function as normal. I have to admit that I am probably more nervous about what is going to happen to my kiddos when I’m gone for 2 weeks than I am about the surgery itself…ah motherhood!
The Mister and I were able to eat at some great restaurants, check out some local shops and the market and visit Folly beach at Sunset. Did I mention we slept? Oh the bliss of no children in the house kind of sleep…no naps interrupted by squeals of disagreement over the wii or by a toddler banging her fist over your head because she is hungry. We slept well and we napped. It was glorious!
I feel peaceful. I feel content. I feel excited. I feel nervous. I feel happy. I feel sad. I feel grateful. I feel blessed. I feel spared. I feel sure. I feel crazy. I feel amazed.
No wonder I can’t sleep yet tonight.
February 1, 2012…a day that will change my life forever.
Category The Journey | Tags: breast cancer,charleston,decisions,family,fear,friends,mister,plastic surgeon,surgeon,travel,waiting | No Comments
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November 24, 2011 by Julie Moon
November has been amazing. I have been blessed beyond belief by my friends. I was able to have an extended visit with one of my besties here…she made arrangements to come without her husband or kids so that we could have just some special one on one time. I truly am grateful. There is nothing quite like hanging out with your good friend for several days straight! I also celebrated my 34th birthday. My friends took me out to a very special dinner and I have a mantle FULL of special birthday cards. This year the birthday cards were different. I really felt like every single one of my friends wrote something really relevant and important. I felt so moved by each and every card. It’s hard to explain exactly but I keep rereading the cards because they are so encouraging. Now it’s Thanksgiving eve and I get to spend time with my family. My parents came to spend the night tonight. The children and i prepared a few things. I chatted in my den, with my parents…listening to some jazz music in the background. I called my brother to schedule our skype date during lunch tomorrow. We will skype he and his wife in for our Thanksgiving meal to pretend that they aren’t in St. Louis but at the head of our table instead. (gosh I really miss them) And then on Saturday I leave for Charleston with my soulmate by my side as my steady companion and we start the planning. So much to be happy about and thankful for. I am blessed!
Category The Journey | Tags: birthday,charleston,family,friends,mister,travel | No Comments
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November 20, 2011 by Julie Moon
I feel the emotions starting to bubble up. Here’s the rambings of an emotional woman…hold on….
I am working lots right now…both of my jobs. Yes I have two jobs on top of being a mother and being married to a very busy entrepreneur. There is tons to do to get ready for Christmas. I’m trying to calmly and rationally knock things off the present list but I feel it hanging over my head. I worked all day today and I’m working most of the day tomorrow. I got upset tonight about the quality of some of my work and I just broke down. I was so mad at myself. I nearly chunked my camera into a brick wall. Thankfully one of my friends was there to listen to me and calmed me down a bit. I’m still pretty upset and disappointed. I know I will get it all figured out but I know I’m better than the work I’m producing. It’s Thanksgiving and I miss my brother. I’m not scared about next weekend meeting the doctors but I think I”m starting to get really emotional about it…like that deep dark emotion that you don’t really realize is in there but it TOTALLY affects you. My friend is out in San Diego at the 3day this weekend and posting pictures and it’s making me so emotional to see the event again. I can’t explain it to you all who haven’t been…I think there’s a Pavlovian reaction to seeing the 3day…just brings it out of me. I’m not out of control. I’m not angry. I just feel a storm brewing in my heart.
Category The Journey | Tags: breast cancer,charleston,family,fear,plastic surgeon,work | No Comments
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November 17, 2011 by Julie Moon
That huge gust of wind you just heard was my mother breathing a sigh of relief. I got the call from Dr. Stallings today that the biopsy results came back with no sign of cancer. Such a relief and so grateful. As my good friend reminded me “Now you can have your surgery on your time.” This is a big deal. I will be leaving next weekend to go to Charleston to meet with my potential surgeons. I am planning so much for next year but I get to do it as a healthy person…cancer free. So grateful that I don’t have to wait until I have cancer to do something about this. Having the opportunity to be proactive is such a blessing.
Category The Journey | Tags: biopsy,breast cancer,charleston,family | No Comments
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November 14, 2011 by Julie Moon
I just realized that tomorrow is my birthday and likely the day that I’ll get my biopsy results. I’m voting for no cancer news on your birthday…talk about Debbie Downer.
Category The Journey | Tags: biopsy,breast cancer | No Comments
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November 12, 2011 by Julie Moon
Not THOSE cupcakes! The cupcakes my friends brought me for my birthday party! Tuesday is my birthday but I celebrated with friends this past Thursday. One friend was in town visiting for the week so we decided to party while she was here. Seven of my dear friends took me out to dinner at my favorite restaurant…pasta, salad, wine, champagne and cupcakes for dessert. It was just what my soul needed. I didn’t want to celebrate my birthday this year. I was feeling very melancholy and just blah about doing something. Thankfully my friends didn’t let me cancel my birthday. I laughed so hard and had such a good time reminiscing about how I had met each and every one of them. It was a miracle that everyone invited was able to attend….considering we have 16 children between us. They know me so well and I got some wonderful presents.
Category The Journey | Tags: birthday,friends | No Comments
